Calling All Agents!
I have always wanted to be a secret agent! For as long as I can
remember, I have wanted to be James Bond. I mean.....who wouldn't?
I would love nothing more in life than to sip Martini's (shaken,
not stirred), bed beautiful women (Jane Seymore), and defeat
scary bad guys (Jaws) for a living.....not to mention having the
best collection of cars and gadgets known to man!!
I travel quite a bit for business (good cover, huh?), and on my
last flight home the airline was screening "Goldfinger". It is
by far my favorite Bond movie, starring Sean Connery. Connery is
the consummate Bond. A had a few Martini's on the flight, and
was ready to save the world by the time we arrived in New York.
I realized I had a bit of a buzz as I waited for my luggage. I
was hardly intoxicated, but I was certainly feeling no pain.
Aye......it's not easy being a secret agent (inner monologue - thick
Scottish brogue). It took a while for my suitcase to arrive on
the carousel. To be honest, I was getting rather dizzy watching
it go round and round and round again. And out of the blue, I
saw her standing there.
I swear to you, on everything I hold dear, that it was her. I
couldn't begin to explain it. I had just seen her on the screen
during the flight, and here she was standing beside me at the
airport. It was Pussy Galore! I almost dropped my X-Ray specs!!
As Bond-like as possible, I tried to play it cool. It was
imperative that I speak with her. Think about the mission. "Good
evening, fair lady", I said (again, thick Scottish brogue). She
smiled and said something I cannot recall. I honestly don't know
what she said, but I am almost positive that I heard what I did.
"My name is Pussy Galore", I heard. Obviously I responded, as
coolly as possible, "I must be dreaming". She bent over and
picked her suitcase from the carousel, winked at me as she
placed her business card in my hand, and strutted away. I just
stood and watched as she wandered off into the crowded airport,
only once looking back to smile. It all happened in slow motion.
Fade to black.
I was shaken awake by the stewardess upon our arrival in New
York. I must have fallen asleep, martini in hand, watching
"Goldfinger". What a strange dream! I looked all around for Ms.
Galore as I waited for my luggage. I picked my Zero Halliburton
aluminum suitcase, and hailed a cab. I'm sure I was being
followed
About the Author
Aleister Q. Fleming never gives out his real name. Nor does he
ever take the same route twice. He carries his Zero Halliburton
aluminum suitcase everywhere he goes. You know how he likes his
Martini's. When he is not saving damsels in distress or driving
his Aston Martin, he writes absurd articles about trivial
nonsense for websites such as http://www.designerhandbags101.com
- a site that offers info on fendi handbags and Versace purses.
The Zero Halliburton Company on livinginstyle.tv show produced by eastshoreproductions.com.wmv
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